Confessions of a Stay at Home Mama


We all have some skeletons in our closets, and now that I am in my early thirties, my “skeltons” are more like daily occurrences and behaviors that would cause my twenty-something self to shake her head in disappointment. I would never be that mom. But now I am, and I’m okay with it. Funny how times change.

The great thing about the internet is that it can be completely anonymous. Now that is not a challenge- I know you could figure out who Elleigh and I are, where we live, and what our grades were in AP English IV if you tried hard enough… But please don’t! I feel sure that we will post pictures soon enough, but this is our first rodeo, and baby steps are more our style.

And in the spirit of anonymity, I feel compelled to share some of my mama secrets that I prefer to keep to myself in “real life,” for fear of intense judgement from my non-mama friends. So here goes nothing…

1. I am still buying and wearing maternity jeans. It might not sound too outlandish, right? Well, what if I told you that my baby is eight months old? And that I am back to my pre-pregnancy weight? Would you judge me then?

2. My house is impeccably clean. My husband feels *so* lucky to have such a wonderful wife who not only takes care of his baby girl, but manages to clean the house and have dinner on the table every night, too. Her name is Lupita. She is my secret maid. Enough said.

3. I am afraid of the baby monitor. Have you ever seen the movie White Noise? We have a bad a** top of the line monitor, and I keep it on my nightstand every night. Turned-off. But don’t worry, Baby A’s nursery is maybe ten feet from our bedroom, and I keep both of our doors open at night.

4. I don’t like other people’s children. Except Ellie’s baby boy, of course. Is that awful?

5. I spent New Year’s Eve at home for the first time EVER. I wore my comfiest pair of Victoria Secret PJs, drank red wine with my husband, and loved every minute of it.  

So there it is. My deepest, darkest mama secrets. And if my twenty-something self knew how happy and fulfilled I felt in this moment in time, maybe she wouldn’t judge me quite so harshly.




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